Have you ever taken the 5 Love Languages quiz? Like a lot of people, I’m obsessed with all those self-identifying tests and tools. (Don’t even get me started on the Enneagram, because I could talk about that for days). The 5 love languages though, are super simple and helpful in relationships of all kinds. Basically, when we know someone’s love language, we can better show up for them.
It may be no surprise that I’m a words person. Words of encouragement make me feel loved and seen. They’re also the way I like to show people my love. Even if words of encouragement/affirmation aren’t your highest scoring love language, who doesn’t like to receive them, right?
I’m always picking up cute note cards for those moments I get the nudge to write someone. I recently got these adorable cards in the mail from Dayspring’s “Hey Momma” line and I’m LOVING them! They’re adorable, great quality, and have the perfect messages to speak right to the hearts of mommas in the thick of things.
As soon as I got them I immediately thought of a few friends I could send them to. It was fun to pray over the words in those cards and then eagerly wait as they were shipped off to their different destinations via snail mail. Receiving personal mail is the best!
I heard from each girl about how the card touched their hearts and brightened their week (see their responses below), and it made MY week! I share this to remind us all (me included) that we should say those things that pop into our heads more often. Those little feelings that nudge our heart to move. They’re important and often times life-giving beyond what we understand.
God has used people time and time again to speak life into the weary seasons of my life. He has sent me words that refreshed, words that gave me the push I needed, words that affirmed and words that made sure I felt seen. How cool that we have a God who cares for us so intimately and so intentionally that He sets other people in motion to remind us of His love for us and our capability in Him.
I watch my daughter interact with her friends and I’m reminded of what a sense of freedom children have. They say what they think and they love unapologetically large. When did we get so consumed with competing and comparing that we forgot how to do this? If we could just get outside of ourselves, I think it would flow more freely—and not just shallow compliments, but real true affirmation and encouragement. The kind that shows people they are seen and loved.
So, let’s be doers of this, friends! Let’s ignore the enemy’s attempts to make us feel silly or competitive, and let’s be women who are in the business of blessing others with our words. Who are we to rob others of the encouragement God wants to speak to their hearts and ours?
“Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”
-Proverbs 16:24 (NIV)
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”
-1 Thessalonians 5:11
Here are 3 simple ways to get better at encouragement:
Listen. Listen to your friend’s heart and hear where they are. In moments of weariness and overwhelm, we don’t need someone to solve our problem for us. (Even though resisting that can be hard— for me too!) We just need to know we are loved and seen on the journey. So, be a good listener and you’ll know what they need.
Stock up. Stock up on a few cards so that when the moment comes to write someone, you don’t have to worry about going to get one. You aren’t as likely to do it if it’s not right there for you.
Pray. Pray for this person and ask God to give you the words they need to hear. Be open to where He leads, even if it doesn’t make much sense to you at the moment. Sometimes God calls us to encourage someone we aren’t close with. It can feel awkward and vulnerable to reach out, but don’t let your fear get in the way of what He wants you to do. Blessings flow from obedience. There has never been a time that I’ve walked away from encouraging someone and felt regret.
I pray we’d all be intentional in reaching out to someone with a heart of encouragement this week! I’d love to hear about it if you do! Tag me on Instagram or come back and comment here. I hope you have a wonderful week!